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Dec 21, 2008 1:48:47 GMT -5
Post by Greyplague on Dec 21, 2008 1:48:47 GMT -5
Lake, one more: 11) Which country builds the überbritish Triumph Bonneville? Thieu.
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BluesRider
H.M.F.I.C.
A.K.A. CommandoRoadster Livin' the dream........
Posts: 2,765
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Dec 21, 2008 2:23:38 GMT -5
Post by BluesRider on Dec 21, 2008 2:23:38 GMT -5
Two Irishmen walked past a pub in Dublin.
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BluesRider
H.M.F.I.C.
A.K.A. CommandoRoadster Livin' the dream........
Posts: 2,765
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JOKES!
Dec 21, 2008 2:24:13 GMT -5
Post by BluesRider on Dec 21, 2008 2:24:13 GMT -5
Hey,it could happen!
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Lake
Manx
Posts: 1,905
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Dec 21, 2008 2:26:38 GMT -5
Post by Lake on Dec 21, 2008 2:26:38 GMT -5
Lake, one more: 11) Which country builds the überbritish Triumph Bonneville? Thieu. In my case its England - hahahahahahaha!!!!
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Dec 21, 2008 6:24:08 GMT -5
Post by Greyplague on Dec 21, 2008 6:24:08 GMT -5
So is mine- I live just 100 miles and a couple of wet feet further down the road. My bike came from Hinckley via France into Belgium. Thieu.
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noddy
Manx
[red]All Blarney-All the time![/red]
can't afford an avatar
Posts: 1,211
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Dec 21, 2008 16:56:19 GMT -5
Post by noddy on Dec 21, 2008 16:56:19 GMT -5
They always ask at the doctor's office why you are there, and you have to answer in front of others what's wrong with you. Sometimes it is embarrassing. There's nothing worse than a receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients. I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy handled it.....
An 86-year-old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the desk... The receptionist said, 'Yes sir, what are you seeing the doctor for today?'
'There's something wrong with my dick,' he replied. The receptionist became irritated and said, 'You shouldn't come into a crowded waiting room and say things like that.' 'Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you,' he said.
The receptionist replied, 'You've caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear or something and discussed the problem further with the doctor in private.'
The man replied, 'You shouldn't ask people questions in a room full of strangers if the answer could embarrass anyone.
The old lad walked out, waited several minutes, and then re-entered.
The receptionist smiled smugly and asked, 'Yes?'
'There's something wrong with my ear,' he stated.
The receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice.
'And what is wrong with your ear, sir?'
'I can't piss out of it,' he replied.
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Dec 21, 2008 18:26:21 GMT -5
Post by scctrim on Dec 21, 2008 18:26:21 GMT -5
A man and his wife were driving home one very cold night when the wife asks her husband to stop the car. There was a baby skunk lying at the side of the road, and she got out to see if it was still alive. It was, and she said to her husband, 'It's nearly frozen to death. Can we take it with us, get it warm, and let it go in the morning?' He says, 'OK, get in the car with it.' The wife says, 'Where shall I put it to get it warm?' He says, 'Put it between your legs. It's nice and warm there.' 'But what about the smell?' said the wife. He says, 'Just hold its little nose.' The man is expected to recover. But the skunk she used to beat him with...died at the scene.
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Dec 21, 2008 18:28:15 GMT -5
Post by scctrim on Dec 21, 2008 18:28:15 GMT -5
A young boy comes down for breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if he has done his chores.
"Not yet," said the little boy.
His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores.
Well, he's a little ticked off so when he feeds the chickens, he kicks a chicken.
When he feeds the cows, he kicks a cow.
When he feeds the pigs, he kicks a pig.
He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.
"How come I don't get any eggs and bacon and why don't I have any milk in my cereal?" he asks.
'Well, his mother says, I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week."
I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon for a week either.
I saw you kick the cow so for a week you aren't getting any milk."
Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen.
The little boy looks up at his mother with a smile,
and says,
"You gonna tell him or should I?
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Dec 21, 2008 18:40:55 GMT -5
Post by davidc on Dec 21, 2008 18:40:55 GMT -5
. Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen. The little boy looks up at his mother with a smile, and says, "You gonna tell him or should I? ;D No shakey puddin' for pop! ;D
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BluesRider
H.M.F.I.C.
A.K.A. CommandoRoadster Livin' the dream........
Posts: 2,765
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Dec 22, 2008 11:15:15 GMT -5
Post by BluesRider on Dec 22, 2008 11:15:15 GMT -5
Noddy sent this to me. Thought I'd pass it along.Don't nobody go gettin'yer undies all in a twist.It's all in good fun! www.sockandawe.com/
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Dec 23, 2008 16:14:50 GMT -5
Post by Stagger Lee on Dec 23, 2008 16:14:50 GMT -5
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Dec 23, 2008 17:46:42 GMT -5
Post by davidc on Dec 23, 2008 17:46:42 GMT -5
A man on his way to work is speeding along the freeway, when to his dissmay, he is pulled over by Officer Bonehead. Officer Bonehead approaches the car and says "hey buddy I clocked you at over 100, where’s the fire?" The man sighs and replies "well there’s no fire, but I do work at the hospital." Officer Bonehead looks at him skeptcall and says "oh what do you do at the hospital?" The guys says "well I’m a rectum strecher." A rectum strectcher!" Bonehead exclaim s. "What the hell is that?" "You see," says the man "I insert wedges in people’s rectums and they graduadlly strech to be about 6 feet wide." "That ridiculos," cries Bonehead, "what would you do with a 6 foot asshole!?" The man smiles and says: "well sir, we usually stick them in a uniform and give them a squad car somewhere in Georgia."
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Lake
Manx
Posts: 1,905
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Dec 23, 2008 17:48:52 GMT -5
Post by Lake on Dec 23, 2008 17:48:52 GMT -5
LOFL
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Dec 23, 2008 18:16:52 GMT -5
Post by davidc on Dec 23, 2008 18:16:52 GMT -5
One day a little boy was sitting at a stop sign beside Police Officer Bonerfide. The little boy was riding a tricycle, and the officer was riding a horse. The officer then looks down at the boy and asked, " Nice bike, did Santa bring you it for Christmas?’’ The liitle boy then replies, " Yes sir he did.". Officer Bonerfide then says " Well next time why dont you asked Santa to put a reflector on the back" and gives the boy a $20 ticket for not having a reflector and bans him from NBR - forever. As the officer gets ready to ride off the little boy asked, " Did Santa bring you that horse?" Wanting to be nice, Officer Bonerfide replies, "Yes, actually he did." Then the little boy suprisingly says " Well next time ask Santa to put the dick under the horse instead of on top!"
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Dec 23, 2008 22:26:13 GMT -5
Post by scctrim on Dec 23, 2008 22:26:13 GMT -5
LMAO
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